Well, it has been a few days since I posted and what a few days they have been. In the past four days we have dicussed a major family decision, spent the day in Concordia for our nephew, had a couple of incidents at Target, and generally lived life. I did pretty well through it all. Not as well as I would like, but OK.
Have you ever felt like you are the only fat person around? It seems like I am in a family surrounded by people who have never known what it was like to be heavy or that have had to work to lose weight. I was in Concordia, KS this weekend and all of Dan's brothers and sisters were there. I am the only one that is struggling, constantly, with my weight. And, as is typical for a family gathering, there were lots of goodies. Chips, cookies, lemon bars, decadent desserts, you name it. These are the hardest times for me. I seem to always be the only one that doesn't really want to eat these things, all the while being tempted mercilessly by them. I REALLY do want to eat them, but not really, know what I mean? And when every one around me is scarfing down everything in sight it is so hard to be the one person eating sensibly. I did have some chips, well, a lot of chips, and a lemon bar, but I also ate some fruit and I stayed away from the chocolate, graham cracker, pudding thing that would have been the end of all my good intentions! I just hate feeling like the odd man out, so to speak, in situations that involve food. If there are so many fat people in this country, why am I always the only fat person in the room? Why am I the only one that doesn't seem to have any self control? Does anyone else feel that way, too? It drives me crazy! Now, maybe everyone else feels something similar, but when surrounded by a bunch of slim people eating like crazy, it doesn't seem that way. I'm starting to think the only time they do eat is when they are in a group of people. It doesn't seem fair, the fight I seem to have to fight every day just to maintain the weight I am at when people who are 20-30lbs thinner than me can never exercize, eat whatever, whenever, and never gain an ounce. I just don't get it.
The good news is that after a week I am down 1.7lbs. Not a lot of weight, but within the range considered healthy. Last Monday I got sucked into that show, Dance your Ass Off and there were people losing 11-14lbs in one week! I wish it would happen that fast for me. Something else that doesn't seem fair? You can put on weight a lot faster than you can take it off. What is up with that?!? :-)
Well, so long for now. Let's hope this week is successful as well!
'til tomorrow,
Angel
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